I met Danica in the 6th grade, and we have been very important to each other ever since that moment. So, when she told me that her and her fiancé Connor were going to get married in February 2023 in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico I set my eyes on that goal and was going to do whatever I had to do to make it there. I joked for a while that I would sell my left arm on the black market if I had to, I was getting to this wedding. For a while it was a stress making sure this goal would come to fruition. So, once I got to Cabo deep breaths set in and I made sure to take many moments to express gratitude. To acknowledge that I made it, and to drink it all up. And what a trip/wedding to remember - my God!
Us girls unified and started planning. In this group was Chasity, Lexi, Tuna, and myself. The days were counting down until our departure and I couldn't help but feel a sense of surreal-ness. My best friend was about to get married, and we were gifted with witnessing it. I had seen pictures of her dress, makeup and hair trial and I was putting this image together in my head of her as a bride. It was the most beautiful image ever but she surpassed it by miles. The whole duration of time in Cabo was a trip to remember but the wedding itself was something of absolute dreams.
When we rolled into Cabo we went outside the airport to look for our taxi that would be taking us to the time share. There was some stress when doing this because we couldn’t find him right away but when we spotted him there was no denying that this was our guy. Below is a picture of the sign we were greeted with “TUNA AND HER BITCHES” and you could imagine just how much we were hoopla-ing over it once we saw it. This started the trip out just on the right tone of the hilarious adventure that we were about to embark on. In the picture below we have Chasity on the far left. Everyone reading should know who Chasity is by now, but if you don’t go read my post about her titled Chasity – Cookie – Zoody. Next to her is Tuna. For those of you who don’t know Tuna, she is one of my best friends and we have grown quite close over the years. (Her nickname is Tuna because her last name is Antuna and she prefers to be called by the nickname, as for me – I call her TunTun). Tuna is one of those people for me that I can always count on to match my energy. When we are together, everything just flows really well and we balance each other out greatly. We know how to talk each other down and can speak the others language really well. We have started on this healing journey together, and one of our favorite sayings through it is "We're healing, We're growing, We're doing better." Whether we are healing, on a trip together, dancing, or facetiming I always feel as though I have someone riding in the same exact car on the rollercoaster ride of life when I am with Tuna. She has been through a lot in her short life, because of that she inspires me to be stronger through struggle. I always say that if I ever come across trouble, I want Tuna by my side because that woman can hold her own. Tuna doesn’t like when people cry, but one of the only people that she is comfortable with crying, is me. She always sticks up for me and has my back when it happens and comforts me even though she doesn’t do that with anyone else. She is Bae #1, she is family now as far as I’m concerned. Then there is the young lad in the middle that had to hold the sign to get us. I asked him if it was embarrassing and he undoubtedly said yes, he was a really good sport about it though. Then there is me, and next to me is Lexi. For those of you who don’t know Lexi, she has been my best friend since the 5th grade and we call each other sisters because we have grown that bond over the years of knowing one another. Through ups and downs I know that Lexi will always be a constant in my life. Lexi is a very loving person. When she loves, she loves with her whole being and it’s an unmistakable love. She is one of the best listeners that I know and she is very understanding. Lexi loves the beach/ocean, and by love I mean to the point of, that is where her soul feels most restful. She is in the process of getting a full ocean sleeve on her left arm. With her love for the ocean, you could imagine just how jazzed she was about this trip. Lexi loves to feel pretty just like I do. Although this is the case she is a tank of a woman and probably could out lift any dude in the gym. She is amazing with animals and babies. We came across an adorable toddler on this trip when she was a little tipsy and you wouldn’t believe how fast she sobered up, simply put she has a gift with children. I know that if I ever want to do something, Lexi will be right there to be by my side. She is always up for adventure. Lexi is family also. All of these girls are, and that’s what made for the buildup of anticipation for this trip. We were all really good girl friends (and those who weren’t yet formed that friendship on this trip), all single, traveling to Cabo together to watch our other best friend get married to the love of her life. We knew it was going to be a trip of a lifetime, and we were eager to get it started.
We stayed at Pueblo Bonito at Sunset Beach Resort and we were upgraded to an executive suite with a kick ass view. 1212, (or docedoce as we called it) would be our home for the next few days. On our way to the hotel we went to Walmart and grabbed groceries for the week. We ate a good mix of everything throughout our trip whether it was from the room or out at restaurants. But some of our favorites were buffalo wings, tostadas, breakfast quesadillas, ramen noodles, cucumber tomato salad, pad Thai, Nutella crepes, El Grand Pastor Tacos, fresh sea food, we even got a hot dog in there at one point. I think the highlight of our trip food wise for all of us girls were the tacos from El Grand Pastor on Main Street, the Nutella, Banana & Strawberry crepes from The Market on the resort, and this Aloe Vera water we were able to find at any store. These items had us all in a choke hold the whole time and we would continue to indulge in them multiple times throughout our stay.
This was an amazing girls trip and we all traveled really well together. No drama, no fussing, nothing but good vibes. We all just really enjoyed the time that we were spending in Cabo and we were doing it together which was nice. We tended to all be on the same wave length energy wise for pretty much everything which made it a super flowy and easy going trip all around. We went to the famous Squid Row multiple nights where we went to let loose and shake our hair a bit. We would watch the whales quite often. Whether from our balcony or the beach we would watch them for hours breach and blow their holes. We would lose track of time watching them; you can’t really be bored watching wildlife like that. It was an amazing experience for all of us because of the whales. And I can confidently say it was one of our favorite parts of the whole trip. Another favorite part of our stay funnily enough were the golf cart rides around the resort. It was the main form of transportation to get around the windy roads of the huge resort and it gave the best opportunity for bonding between all of us and amazing views. The drivers were all so friendly and happy, it was easy to make quick friends with the majority of them (shout out to my man Alejandro, #38 for being the best driver of all time!). We enjoyed the pool, sun bathing and the beach often. Enjoying the warmth before going back to our snowy Colorado homes.
It is special to be in an environment like this with the people closest to you. It creates the opportunity for moments that will never fade from the memory. Moments like your best friend seeing you have a point of struggle while on the beach and grabbing your hand to get you through it. This point of struggle for me was a moment of fear. A point of awareness of being on this journey to become whole and realizing I am not quite there yet. You see, I feel like it is important for me to share the hard parts as much as I share the positive parts in my blog because it is a crucial part of the process. I try my best to be as positive I can be, and it really does help with my day to day. But there is an existential weight that hits my mind and shoulders at times. A weight of thought and worry. A worry of whether I am doing enough to heal, grow and put an end to old cycles. An understanding of the more I learn, the more I realize I don’t know – and never will. Or doubt. Doubt that I have embarked on this journey to become whole on my own, but what if I never do? This weight is considerable when it hits but it’s usually swift and brief, which is good. These moments don’t take hours out of my day or take me out of special moments, and I do think it’s very normal for any human to have them in some capacity. We are put here on this earth with no answers and people try to find them through different means. Whether it’s through a career, religion, family, success, friendships, relationships, self-discovery, etc. but we will truly never know. Different answerless questions haunt different people, and finding peace through the unknown is a long sought after goal. That is why when these moments pop up I take my time to sit with them and observe them for what they are. I ask important questions such as “What are these feelings and fears trying to tell me?” I sit with them and validate the emotions that come with them, I talk it out if I feel like I have to. What is cool about where I am at with my journey is that I don’t let them fully envelope me and my mind anymore. I don’t let them become truths in my reality. I process these moments and then once the fog lifts, my reason and logic tend to set in. The logic of just because I am not there yet, doesn’t mean I won’t be, I WILL get there. That it doesn’t take overnight to reach goals, it takes persistence, active work, and time. And just because I am not there yet, doesn’t mean that the progress that I have made isn’t substantial. That happiness is not a destination when you reach "x" point in your life. It is a state of conciousness that is fleeting... but that always comes back eventually. It is important to be grateful and present when experiencing it. It is moments like these that make girls trips to Cabo so special and it is important to take a mental picture of them. For this particular moment, Lexi took a physical picture. I love the moment behind the photo and I am grateful that she captured it.
Special moments like these were made daily amongst all of us, and this always tends to be a trend when we get together. These moments are not unusual amongst this group and is a constant that I can always count on with each and every one of them. One thing that was different about this Mexico trip for all of us though, was alcohol. What’s funny about this group is that you can definitely tell all of us don’t have it like we used to drinking wise. We just don’t have the same relationship with alcohol that we used to. For me, as I’ve said I do not drink anymore and just celebrated a year of no drinking besides red wine in December. Tuna is on the sober train for the most part as well, she will indulge every now and again but a lot of the time she doesn’t enjoy it anymore. Chasity does enjoy her alcoholic beverages but she just isn’t 20 years old anymore so you could say it just sits differently is all (lol)😂and Lexi doesn’t enjoy drinking besides the occasional beverage as well. For the most part we are a pretty sober and boring bunch in terms of alcohol. One night, we went to Squid Row and we ordered Sprite and I think the waiter couldn’t have been more disappointed. This is a funny phenomenon I’ve noticed with not drinking. Drinking is such a social practice that people have been conditioned to think that their good time can be affected by me not drinking. When that seriously couldn’t be farther from the case. What I love about this phenomenon is that every time I go out I really love bringing the energy. Which no one expects because of the conditioning that I mentioned earlier. I dance very freely and energetically and people just eat it up. I often have people ask me “Ok, so you’re not drinking… what ARE YOU ON?! Seriously, I want whatever it is” I will get asked some variation of this question every time I go out without fail. I do have to say that I love changing people’s previous ideologies on what sober can look like. I’ve had people ask why I drink red wine but nothing else, or why I indulge in marijuana and mushrooms recreationally, but I don’t drink. I chalk it up to what my body feels best doing and going back to that self-awareness. My body and mind do not like alcohol, I don’t enjoy any part of it anymore. So why partake in it when I don't? One glass of red wine seldomly, my body doesn’t mind at all. And I enjoy Malbec and Pinot Noir extensively. Because of this, I will give my body that treat but it doesn’t have to go any further than that. Nothing has to go further than what YOU want it to. And whatever your boundary lines are, if the people in your life truly respect you - they will respect those lines as well. I think it definitely just depends on personal preference. Everyone is different and needs to listen to what they genuinely enjoy, and what their body wants. My mold won’t work for all but it works for me and I have never felt better in my life. One thing I do know, is that it doesn’t have any sort of impact on my ability to have a good time. And I love that for me.
I will admit I might get carried away with the sugar free red bulls but those mostly just keep me lucid and awake. The energy is from within. If you read up on it, it is very good for everyone but especially women to move their body through dance, shake their hips, shake their hair, etc. Moving the body releases stored up energy as we all know and I use dancing to do this, I genuinely have the best time while doing so. Even one of the nights I wasn’t feeling very well but the girls wanted to go out, I told them I’d go but “I’m not dancing, I’m JUST relaxing” I think we all knew that was a bluff and I proved that to be true later that evening when I inevitably started dancing. Dancing with my girls is one of my favorite past times and I am looking forward to doing it even when I’m old and grey.
Danica is a very special and kind person and she deserves all the good that this life has to offer. Danica is one of those people that any good time would not be complete without her, and I am serious. ANY good time. She brings this energy and fire that is missed when it isn’t there. Now that we are all adults, strung across the country - it is inevitable that all of us can’t be in one place each and every time. With this being a reality, it is painfully obvious when she isn’t with us, and when she is – it feels whole. She is one of the most supportive and thoughtful people I know. She has helped me through some of my darkest days and she truly is textbook definition of what a reliable friend looks like. She is very determined and she loves her people. She will give you the most shit, but in a way where you can’t help but laugh and agree. She will give you the most laughs even in the moments where the last thing you want to do is laugh. And she will give you the most love, when you need it the most. If you have the love of Danica, you are lucky, and you know it too. She can make anyone feel the most loved with even just her presence. She is truly and simply, a beautiful soul inside and out, and she is very important to every single one of us. With that being said, when the wedding day rolled around we were all very excited for the day to get started. We wanted to be there for her in any way that she needed. We wanted to make her day as special as we possibly could. Even if that just meant being there. So Chasity, Lexi and I got our BrideTribe robes on that Danica got us and made the trek to our sister resort where she was getting ready and later that day, married. When we walked in the spa where she was getting ready, her eyes lit up so bright and she was so surprised to see us there. She was not expecting for us to come visit her before the wedding and I think that was one of my favorite parts of the whole day. Seeing how genuinely happy she was to have us there for a little, while she was getting ready. We spent the time talking about the day, bringing up whatever old photos we all had of each other and hyping this girl up while she got ready on the biggest day of her life. She was cool as a cucumber, and so was Connor as we saw him in passing the day off as well.
The wedding itself was immaculate to say the least. Literally every box that you could think of with a wedding, Connor and Danica's wedding checked them all. An unforgettably beautiful venue✔️ A very short but sweet and intimate ceremony✔️A beer guy tossing beers in place of a flower girl tossing flowers✔️ aesthetically pleasing decorations and attire✔️ open bar✔️ amazing food✔️ everyone dancing the whole night away✔️ the new couple kissing under fireworks✔️adorable and unforgettable details✔️ Cake, garter toss, bouquet toss✔️. Everything under the sun. Simply put, it was a perfect evening. Full of great vibes and great people giving those vibes. When Danica got to the top of the aisle and I saw her I lost control of my tear ducts and they starting gushing uncontrollably. I just had a flash of all of these memories of her since the sixth grade pop up in my head like a life flashing before my eyes type thing and then it popped to her standing there at the top of the aisle. How could one not lose it when that happens? She pretty much looked like a Texas beauty queen and Shania Twain had a baby, I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a more beautiful bride if I’m being honest. During the reception she wore her white cowboy boots, her white cowboy hat with silver bedazzles on the underside of it, while Connor wore a really nice jacket and slacks, and an all-black cowboy hat. Danica’s dress was a form fitting spaghetti strap style dress that flattered her every curve in the best possible way. They really did give definition to what a foxy couple looks like.
Danica and Connor asked me to be one of the three people to give speeches during this event and to say I was nervous is a sizable understatement. My mind wasn’t nervous so much, but my body was. My mind was peaceful but when I went up to go give my speech my voice and body trembled. I had to take a few deep breaths through the speech but by the end I had my feet under me. I looked over to Danica a few times during my speech and she had tears in her eyes. I knew I had done what I had set out to do; and that was to make sure Danica knew how special of a human she is, how amazing I think this union between her and Connor is and how proud I am of her on her journey. I have attached a link of the speech at the bottom of this post for anyone that wants to hear it. I enjoyed writing and delivering it and it meant the world that Danica and Connor asked me to give it. It was quite an honor and I can only hope that I did them justice.
Danica and Connor are one of those couples that just make sense. They achieve this balance that is undeniable. I say balance because it is like they the male and female version of the same human, while simultaneously complementing each other’s differences. Meaning, that all of us have human faults, but Danica and Connor give in situations where the other one lacks. They bring each other out of a zone, or wrangle each other in another zone. The respect that they hold for each other is something that any outside party can see. You can see it in their eyes when they look at each other. They continue to build this life together that is admirable and commendable. When looking up to couples they are one that comes to my mind. Achieving that balance and true yin-yang energy between two humans is what we all desire, and Danica and Connor achieve it with grace, class, and whiskey. I am truly grateful that I got to witness the union of these two. And it will be something that I hold dear to my heart for decades to come.
We stayed in Cabo for 2 days after the wedding and I am really glad that we did. It gave us some time to catch our breath before going back home. Watching the sunrise, and taking our time with each other before the inevitable goodbye was important. What this friend group has accomplished is a place of solitude within each other. We have created a space for humor, fun, safety, comfortability, selflessness and support. I am so beyond grateful to have gone with these girls and I can’t thank them enough for the memories.
Congrats Mr. & Mrs. O'Neil!! Thank you for the amazing night and unforgettable memories!! Cheers to your forever, I will be in your corner always!❤️
Some places in Cabo that I recommend:
⁃ The Funky Geisha
⁃ El Grand Pastor: El pastor tacos, carne asada tacos
⁃ Marisco’s La Palmita: soft shell crabs, coconut shrimp, seafood soup, and oysters.